Archive for November, 2019

Veteran’s Day: President Lincoln Weighs In

Saturday, November 9th, 2019

The following, published here every Memorial Day weekend and Veteran’s Day, is a letter from President Lincoln sent to a mother whose sons died in the Civil War for the Union cause

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President Lincoln realized that sacrifice must be made to preserve the republic

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Executive Mansion,
Washington, Nov. 21, 1864.

Dear Madam,

I have been shown in the files of the War Department a statement of the Adjutant General of Massachusetts that you are the mother of five sons who have died gloriously on the field of battle. I feel how weak and fruitless must be any word of mine which should attempt to beguile you from the grief of a loss so overwhelming. But I cannot refrain from tendering you the consolation that may be found in the thanks of the Republic they died to save. I pray that our Heavenly Father may assuage the anguish of your bereavement, and leave you only the cherished memory of the loved and lost, and the solemn pride that must be yours to have laid so costly a sacrifice upon the altar of freedom.

Yours, very sincerely and respectfully,

A. Lincoln

Corporate Applause……

Tuesday, November 5th, 2019

 

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…from a corporatized I.M. Windee

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The following is an internal communiqué to one of Windee’s colleagues:

Spot on, Jones!!!

Your idea is a game changer that displays thought leadership and is a pro-active, value add-on to the commonly misunderstood paradigm of the moving-parts of our business and the resulting synergy will allow scalable best practices that will avoid pain points. Such will lead to managed, dynamic, organic growth for The Daily Yap.

You are clearly no Ideate.

Image result for the office

 Despite his irreverent and satirical prose, I.M. Windee is a corporate….nay…..an “office guy” as his business lexicon displays

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At the End of the Day, this will allow us to drill down into our mind maps and take ownership of our productivity pipelines (I’m talking in a corporate sense so PUT THE HASHTAG DOWN!!!) which will enable us to streamline our mission-critical deliverables process, to an aggregated, right-sized scale.

The bottom line: this will double our readership and we owe it all to you for moving us from 2 to 4 consumers.

Going forward, I will reach out to you, albeit offline and virtually but not through face-time, to make it happen.

I will also ask you to translate to me what the heck I just said.

I.M.W.

enclosures: not needed.

IMW/imw